​The emergence of the "connection economy" over the last several years has destroyed some business segments (Number of VHS tapes rented at Blockbuster Videos in the last 12 months? ZERO), restructured others (Number of CDs purchased versus music files downloaded?), and created entirely new ones (Facebook, Twitter, Yelp, Instagram and Snapchat).  This trend has not only sent non-profits and charities scrambling back to the strategic plan table, it has also altered the landscape of funder and donor expectations, outcome measures, and service delivery.  
 
Like it or not, the Brain Injury Association of Maryland, along with all other non-profit organizations in the United States is now a media company.
 
And if you really think about it, we really have been all along. 
 
For the last 31 years, BIAM has provided information and education about the statewide brain injury resources, healthcare providers, treatment options, programs, initiatives, and policies for and about the brain injury community. Primarily through phone calls and mailings, and later through email and websites, BIAM has been the premier clearinghouse of information for Maryland's brain injury community. 
 
But look at the tools we have at our disposal now.  We can create video segments about brain injury prevention, entertaining short films about people living with brain injury, even commercials about our events and initiatives,  all in high definition at low cost that can be broadcast to every human being on the planet with access to a computer and broadband internet.
 
How is that NOT a T.V. station?
 
We can create Public Service Announcements for Brain Injury Awareness Month, record and post Podcasts with interviews of individuals leading the charge against brain injuries and their aftermath, even create and broadcast live programming from anywhere we can get enough "bars" for our data plan to work. And It all goes out over the internet to as far as the data can reach.
 
 
How is that not a radio station?  
 
We can interview anyone with an email account, write blogs as short or as long as we want about anything, post our opinions and editorials on Facebook or Amazon, create movie reviews on Rotten Tomatoes or Fandango, restaurant reviews on Yelp and delicious, even create and design specialty websites about art and entertainment on tumblr or Blogger. We even have the equivalent of special daily editions, "Extra, Extra, Read All About It!" in our Twitter feeds. 
 
How is that not a newspaper or magazine?
 
As Seth Godin has said, just like the spatula is not the cake and the brush is not the painting, these new social media platforms are not BIAM.  They are wondrous tools for us to do our same old mission in a new, and hopefully, better way.
 
Our primary task remains making a connection with another human being searching for answers, searching for help, searching for hope and providing them all three with compassion, accuracy, and authenticity. That's what we've been about for over three decades, and new tools will not change that core.
 
We will take advantage of all the new tools we have at our disposable. Now rather than waiting for a phone call or sending out a bulk mailing, we will endeavor to reach people where they are and, more importantly, where they are looking. More smartphones were sold last year than computers. Our new "responsive" website and app, and our new emphasis on providing quality contact through Facebook and Twitter, will reflect that new initiative. 
 
We look forward to receiving your feedback and promise to continue innovating and adopting new ways of bringing information to those who needed it quickly, accurately, and lovingly. 

TIMELINES and BRAIN INJURY
 In his song “Beautiful Boy”, John Lennon famously sang that, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” 

 Despite our best efforts, and in complete contradiction to what we rationally know to be true, we all create certain expectations about how our lives are going to play out.  We have timelines in our heads, consciously or unconsciously, about our lives and there is a certain sequence that we expect.  We will attend school for X number of years, then branch out on our own to find a job, start a family after a few years, then build a career or create a home life (or both), work hard, raise our family, and then, if we do everything right, after 30 years or so we will be able retire and enjoy the fruits of our lifelong labor.
 
 We know that there will be ups and downs, but generally, things will progress in a fairly “normal” fashion.  Days turn into weeks turn into months turn in to years turn into a life well lived and enjoyed. At least, that’s the way we’ve convinced ourselves it’s supposed to go.
 Until you have a brain injury.

 It goes without saying that working through the life-threatening physical challenges takes center stage in the early days of a brain injury. However, looming just behind the curtain is the soul shattering grief caused by a disrupted timeline.  And as the days begin to stack up and the critical health concerns begin to resolve, the rage and grief and resentment about being blasted off of a life timeline begins to take hold.

 “She had just started to make it on her own.”

 “We were in the process of selling the business to start traveling the world.”

 “I was headed to college at the end of the summer!”

 “We had only been married six months! What happens now?”

 We all understand there are no guarantees. We all appreciate that anything can happen at any minute that can be a complete game changer.  We are given constant reminders that life is complex and requires a certain amount of give and take just to get through the day.

 And yet we act as if…

 We act as if making plans, and sticking to them will result in the goals we’ve set for ourselves. We live by the aphorism that “Failing to plan is planning to fail”.  Our own actions will lead directly to the life we envision for our self. Tragedies like brain injuries happen to other people and disrupt other families. Equally undeserving to be sure, but other people, nonetheless. Losing the “certainty” of one’s timeline is disorienting and bewildering.   It is expressed in as many different ways as there are people experiencing it. But the overarching anger, frustration, and grief surrounding the loss of a family’s timeline is one of most common issues we deal with at BIAMD. 

 “When will I start being able to think clearly again?”

 “How long will he have to stay in that skilled nursing facility?”

 “Why everything going so slowly?”

 “He seems to be doing the same for the last several weeks? How long until he gets back to normal?”

 At BIAMD, we try to provide encouraging words. We discuss the stages of grief, the loss of the person who was and gift of the person who remained, rediscovery and renewal, cherishing the victories whenever and however they come, the healing power of therapy, counseling, and time, and the need to discover and make peace with a “new normal.”  But mostly, we just listen.

 Nothing about brain injury is easy, certain, or guaranteed. 

 Then again, neither is living.
 
 We may not be able to control the storm, but we can certainly reset our sails.  The new normal requires acceptance of what is right now, today, this minute.  Work to enjoy and be grateful for THIS time since there are no guarantees for any others.  And with everything that goes along with brain injury, enjoying and feeling grateful takes a LOT of work.

 Nonetheless, only by realizing that the trust and energy we put into our timeline was misplaced to begin with, will we be able to find a way out of the maze in which we feel trapped.  Grieve its loss. Accept that there is no way to fully recapture our old timeline. Some survivors take comfort in seeking "renewal" rather than "recovery". Renew who you are instead of trying to recover who you were. 

 And a challenging as it may be, particularly when you are in the darkest part of the tunnel, always remember that you are not your timeline and that you don’t even need a timeline to make the most of the gifts you still possess.  ​